You listen for context. You listen to the tone of voice. And you look for cues in their body language. When you read the person, you learn so much more than someone who just talks.

How do you build Trust in sales?

I’m curious, Ronan. You often say that Rapport is not about being liked. It is about being trusted. What do you mean?

Well, who would you prefer to buy from, someone you like, or someone you trust?

There you go with those leading questions again Ronan. It is a no-brainer. But, I still don’t see the relevance.

The world of sales has moved from talking to listening. In B2B sales you must become a consultative seller. It is not an option. It is a pre-requisite. Consultative sellers are listeners, not talkers. Listening builds trust.

I am a good listener.

But, you remind me of myself when I was younger. You listen to interrupt.

I don’t understand.

You don’t talk, but that does not mean you are listening. In most cases, you are thinking through your best strategy to interrupt and continue to sell.

Ronan that is harsh. It is a good job I like you!

But, we have a trust established too. And you know that my intentions are sincere. It is not a criticism but an observation.
You see too many people confuse being silent with listening. You need to listen with your eyes and your ears.

I don’t get you?

You listen for context. You listen to the tone of voice. And you look for cues in their body language. When you read the person, you learn so much more than someone who just talks.

I always prided myself on my ability to read the room.

So did I once. Until I learned the skill of “shutting up”. And being “present”. In other words. When I made the decision that I would focus my attention on other people. And not my agenda.

Do you think that is what I do? Focus on my agenda?

What do you think?

I think I want to punch you in the face because you have hit a nerve.
Other than my girlfriend nobody has ever been so direct with me about my listening skills.
On one level it really annoys me. On another, I see the value in becoming more internally focused. I do tend to have a razor-like focus on my own agenda. I can’t deny it.

The good news is you are naturally likeable. You will find it relatively easy to move to the next level. And build trust more easily. But, you need to identify what needs to change.

I suppose I need to understand more about, what did you call it? Being “present”. It is a bit of an alien concept.

You would be amazed how often you are “present” with people. It is a natural instinct that requires a slight shift in mindset. For example. When you go home this evening and, you ask your girlfriend how did her day go. Will you be “present” and genuinely listen with interest. Or will it be a conversation filler? One you ask when in truth you don’t want to know the answer. You want to be able to tell her about your day.
Being “present” means you take a genuine interest.
Now if you can do that at home, you can do it at work. It is a choice. You choose to be interested, or interesting.

I like that “interested, or interesting”.

Yeah, I learned that from John Maxwell. And by the way, it is not easy to switch from talker to listener. So, if you are serious about changing. Commit and practice.

I have a lot to think about Ronan. I am going to take your advice and focus on being “present” as much as possible. I have two sales meetings tomorrow, and I’ll put these ideas into practice then. I’ll report back on my progress.

Great, we can talk next week about your progress.

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Regards Ronan

Call me on +353(86) 7732201

Ronan Kilroy | Insthinktive Sales Leadership Ltd. | Blanchardstown, | Dublin 15, | Office 01 8220523

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